Category: TRANSFORMATION

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NO SHAME IN REST
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NO SHAME IN REST

Meet me through Cameron’s lens, the boy who crowded into the bathroom with his brothers and shaved my head. “G.I. Jane,” he shouts above the motor and the waves. And this is the smile that transcends any notion of a hard season put to rest. Rest. For me, a tiny word that has always wedged...

TAKING TERRITORY
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TAKING TERRITORY

I live at the edge of a forest. When we lived at the beach, I used to rake the sand in front of our cottage, so I know it won’t surprise you that I rake the dirt under the trees. I have full awareness that the forest doesn’t belong to me, but I take great...

Welcome Peace
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Welcome Peace

Soon after Mama died my daddy moved away. Not far. But distant enough to make our daily hugs impossible. The first time I saw his house I was so impressed. I had always thought it was my mama who had the taste in the family. As it turns out, my daddy was terribly good at...

Accessing the Heart
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Accessing the Heart

It was Yo-Yo Ma playing. I’m a sentimental girl and so when the nurse asked me what I wanted to hear I told him something with strings [this is your cue to find the Yo-Yo Ma channel on Pandora and listen as you read]. The day before getting on a plane to start my chemotherapy...

And So, We Paint
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And So, We Paint

I have discovered the color of disquiet and it is Shell White. Enamel, Flat, and Satin, SW8917 has left evidence of a troubling I cannot name… on the rim of my glasses, under my nails, and even on the half-inch hairs where “entirely bald” used to be [if you’re wondering, it’s mostly grey, the outgrowth...

IT BEARS REPEATING
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IT BEARS REPEATING

I’m troubled by the recent acceleration of activity surrounding our “institutions” and their heightened effort to immunize our children with the latest vaccine. There are mounds of public documentation on legitimate platforms across the globe that share specific details regarding why this might not be a good idea. I implore you to do the research...

LIKE A MOTHER
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LIKE A MOTHER

I put on my wig today and decided I like myself better bald.This story is not about hair but the miraculous property of transformation that is begging to be discussed. We mistake transformation as something we manipulate and devise.When I was first diagnosed, I crafted this impressive plan containing all the lessons I was certain...

Je Ne Sais Quoi
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Je Ne Sais Quoi

I write because it’s my way of entering into conversation with the world. My fingers find their purpose pressed on the keys and I find my voice in concert with their quiet tapping. Sometimes I type with my eyes closed and the words appear faster than the thoughts are consciously formed. It’s as if my...

TAKE AWAYS
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TAKE AWAYS

I really wanted to write this from my last appointment in the chemo chair. But the necessary Benadryl makes me loopy, at least just enough to reach endlessly for the keyboard and never finding it there. Just out of reach. Do you ever sense your real life is right there but shrouded in a fog...

The Neighborhood
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The Neighborhood

Wherever I am in the world I always walk the neighborhoods. It’s not the grand tourist destinations but the quiet pedestrian scenes that speak to the artist in me who will gladly forego the museum history lessons to become a brushstroke within the landscape of living, breathing art. When I work with a new client...